Evolution Marches On

In an astonishing feat of adaptation, trees in Washington State have evolved the ability to seize and ingest bicycles.  The is an advantageous mutation for the tree because

1. it gets more iron in its diet
2. it becomes unharvestable by Evil Big Timber

In addition, it suggests a more sustainable way of getting all those old used bicycles off the street.  The mutation is so radical that evolutionists are hailing it as an instance of speciation and creationists are denying it has even happened.  Some environmentalists meanwhile believe that it was the bicycle that attacked the tree and that the event proves the dangers of riding bicycles at high speed in the woods.  They point out ominously that the bicycle's seat -- and any likely rider -- is fully embedded in the tree.