He had retrieved the body from the Geek Squad mortuary, where they had cried three times "Lazarus come forth!" -- once with power+battery, once with power/no battery, and once with battery only -- but the machine remained alas unresponsive and would not "boot up" (in the colorful jargon of computer mavens). Such pity did overwhelm the Geeks that they refunded TOF's unrefundable give-it-a-try fee on the basis that they could not do jack and therefore deserved no jack. (O! Would that more vendors took similar attitudes.)
"Let us go forth among the gentiles," said the Incomparable Marge, "and find a replacement for Faithful Companion!"
And so TOF approached the corpse with a yardstick to measure its screen. (Well, the yardstick was handy. What can I say.) He flipped open the lid, measured the urim and thummin and the diagonal, turned away for a moment. Then he looked back and saw to his amazement, the device was booting itself. No buttons had been pressed. No one had cried "Erwache!" But there were the lines of DOS chiding all and sundry that the computer had previously been shut down in irregular wise. TOF agreed that spilling water thereon was indeed irregular. Then, Lo!, Starting Windows appeared and soon thereafter, the Desktop, apparently none the worse for wear.
Sore amazed, TOF stuck his fingers in the holes. Files were opened, intertubes accessed, functions tested. All appeared well. This is apparently a direct intervention by St. Isidore of Seville, patron saint of computers, and would surely qualify the dude for canonization were he not already among the ranks of the Elect. TOF sends a hearty, "Thanks, Izzy!" for his timely intervention.
Faithful Companion is now to be renamed LAZARUS.
|Flynn and friend in palmier days, |
with a laptop on, of all places, his lap.