Or not.
Monday, May 12, 2014
Save Lives, Stop Funding Science!
There is a 99% correlation between "US spending on science, space, and technology" and "suicides by hanging, strangulation and suffocation." You can't argue with statistics, can you?
It is unclear which is the cause and which is the effect. But clearly Something Must Be Done! Even if the correlation might not be as strong as it appears, the Precautionary Principle demands that we take measures Just In Case. And of course, further research is needed. Why does science spending cause this particular mode of suicide? Does it perhaps suck all the oxygen out of the room?
Or not.
Or not.
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TOF once wrote an article entitled "The Great Ptolemaic Smackdown and Down 'n Dirty Mud-Wrassle" which described the century-l...
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Hello family, friends and fans of Michael F. Flynn. It is with sorrow and regret that I inform you that my father passed away yesterday,... -
1. The Great Ptolemaic Smackdown 2. The Great Ptolemaic Smackdown: Down for the Count 3. The Great Ptolemaic Smackdown: The Great Gali...
But, but - the West Antarctic ice sheet is melting, irrevocably! Ocean levels will rise 10 feet in 200 years! We're all GOING TO DIE!
ReplyDelete(I seem to remember a future history in which the polar ice caps were deliberately melted in order to provide more arable land in northern latitudes...)
Hopefully also in an attempt to get rid of Florida.
DeleteThe burning question: does anybody have to actually watch all the Nick Cage movies we're going to need to produce in order to keep people in helicopters safe?
ReplyDeletePerhaps the suicides were those whose grant proposals were rejected?
ReplyDelete